tucky | ♻ 015

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♻ 015 | video

[The rips had closed up days ago, but Tiffany doesn't trust that right away - people were still missing and there was clearly something weird going on down at the port, so she refrains from acting like everything is over and done with yet. When people start appearing back on the ship, however, she tentatively lets herself start to believe that things really are winding down... which leads to another problem, for her.]

So, uh… during all that, I had some trouble, and Mason took my soul out of my body for a little bit, so I wouldn't be in pain and couldn't get hurt. He was great, by the way; a fucking badass - strong and brave and fighting monsters. He saved my life. He was a hero.

Y'all tell him that the next time you see him, okay?

[He revels in compliments and praise the same way she does; she has a feeling he'll like it.

And it’s so, so tempting to just focus on that and end the post right there - to do something similar to what she did after the jaeger breach and just gush about how so many people had helped her, and how nice it feels to know she has them in her corner. To just ignore the uncomfortable parts in favor of the good.

But it wouldn’t work as well the second time, and for once, she isn’t sure she’d want it to.]

But when I was out of myself, I tried to go inside a monster, and it-- I didn't really do it, but I almost did, and I felt its soul. It was the worst thing I have ever felt in my life; it was worse than dying in my dreams during that flood. It felt evil, and now my soul feels tainted.

[It isn't, really - luckily for her, any aftereffects from the experience are all in her head.]

I died a lot and then I did that, and I'm worried my soul is turning bad because of it. I don't got any real evidence, so it might not be, but... I think I would appreciate it if someone could check, or try to do an exorcism on me. Just in case.

[She smiles a twitchy smile that doesn't reach her eyes.]

I ain't panicking this time, like I did before. But if there's something wrong with me, I wanna get it fixed.

Thanks.

[filtered to Simon]

... Hey, Simon. Hi.

[filtered to Cambridge]

Maybe when we do our next therapy meeting, we can talk about this? About dying and stuff. I don’t…

I don't think I’m handling it too well.

[filtered to Ricki]

Can I talk to you?

[warden filter]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I think you're just now learning, and it's a pretty awful process.

And if y'all didn't let these dangerous assholes do whatever they want, I wouldn't be having to learn at all.

It's not like we sat back in lawn chairs and made bets while they worked their crazy voodoo. One thing you're gonna have to learn about failure? Placing blame doesn't fix it.

Neither does not doing anything after.

I would point out that we're not doing nothing, but I think this will go faster if I just ask what you think we should be doing.

Taking Arthas down. For good, hopefully.

We can't, and it wouldn't be.

Don't see what good you are, then.

I have my uses. For example, saying things like you're scared and you feel guilty, and that's normal, but you don't know how to deal with either of those things so you're taking it out on the wardens because we're an easy target. And if you don't take some time to think about what you really want to accomplish here you're never going to get it done.

... You don't even know me; you don't know how I'm feeling.

And yet, you look like I just hit the nail on the head.

So you fucking guessed and maybe you weren't completely wrong. So what?

I didn't guess. When I first came here as an inmate it was out of a bad gang war that I played a big part in. I know misdirected anger when I see it.

It ain't totally misdirected. I am angry he ain't getting punished.

You're welcome to make suggestions. I will tell you he's been here for basically forever, though, so it's all old hat for him.

Zero, forever. When he gets out in a week, put him right back in.

Solitary fucks with you. The reason it don't affect him much is because a week is nothing.

I don't know that that hasn't been tried already. It'd be tough to work out, since his warden is gone. And I'm not sure that 'fucking with him' will really help anything. He used to go on mass murdering sprees, did you know? In comparison this is pretty tame. I hate to think of him getting mass murder into his head again. He's really good with a sword.

He went on a mass murdering spree. He just used monsters instead of his own self.

He created a distraction so he could try to rip a hole in the fabric of space time or something. Trust me, it'll be way worse when his only goal is to kill as many people as possible.

Are you just gonna wait around for that to happen again?

Tiffany. Think for a minute. One, if we kill Arthas he'll just come back to life again. Two, killing him is the exact opposite of what this place is intended for. Three, right now he's human and mostly harmless. If he comes back as a lich again he'll be way more powerful and way more trouble. Four, execution is a process and you can't just skip all those steps because you're scared.

You could. It ain't like there are laws here.

It's his fault Mason got hurt.

There's morality, and as far as I'm concerned whoever's being amoral at the moment is the bad guy.

[ But she's sympathetic. ]

Hey. Is Mason okay now?

He's fine.

Are you gonna do better next time?

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