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lastvoyages
[If I don't have an active post up, feel free to use this post to have your character call, videochat, text, or knock on Tiffany's door.]
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[And obviously saying it doesn't seem to be sinking in, so she starts moving, going to pick up the few things she's left lying around -- a book, a hairbrush.]
You can be irresponsible with your own life, but not with mine.
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[She stays on the couch, but sits up.]
You ain't wrong to be mad, but you're wrong about me. I wouldn't-- sacrifice you; that's not it. If you don't wanna know the truth, that's fine, you don't owe me nothing, but you got the wrong idea about how I think.
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If you don't understand how you already are, how you already did, then I'm definitely not staying.
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[Because she wishes Nina would stay, but she definitely doesn't think she can talk her into it.]
You think I was laughing. Maybe you think I'd laugh if somebody hurt you. But I wasn't and I wouldn't.
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[She doesn't stop packing, her movements becoming increasingly frenetic as she shoves things into her bag; she's distressed enough now that for a change, even she isn't thinking about folding neatly.]
I think you would tell me you were very, very sorry, and you would mean it, and you wouldn't stop to think how anything you just did might have led to it, and then you would do all the same thing again.
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Do you know why I haven't died here yet? Because I leave people like that alone.
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[And maybe that's another reminder of why she doesn't think she really can be friends, actual friends, with the wardens; maybe it just reminds her that she can't forget how alone she actually is here. It doesn't matter. It can't. Nothing but survival matters, at least until they're through the Land of the Dead.]
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That's what I've been trying to say.
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[Her voice shakes a little, but she's not trying to fight that any more than she was a minute ago.]
I said that, too.
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Chose to have me go. So I'm going. You do whatever you want.
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Fine.
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[She says nothing more, filling her bag. Every choice she's given Tiffany, as she sees it, has been written off in one way or another; in fact, everything she's said to Tiffany about making choices at all has been written off as if it had never happened at all. As if Nina just decided to go crazy for no reason and leave. As if nothing she said even made the slightest impact.
It might be petty at this point, and entirely pointless, but she's not giving her even one more chance to pretend that something she decided perfectly well on her own is on Nina's shoulders. Let her choose. Let her make one fucking decision for herself and own it. In fact, just so there's not the slightest bit of legroom on the topic, she adds belatedly:]
I'll go along with whatever you do.
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I don't want you to go along with what I want. I'm not gonna order you to do shit, Nina. I will respect it if you don't want me to talk to you. I will.
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I told you already -- it's up to you. I don't know how much more clearly I can say that.
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Maybe I can't decide. Maybe I think about it differently from you. Maybe I'm choosing not to make any choice at all.
[She finally has all of her things gathered, and she closes the bag and holds it in both her hands.]
So? Should I expect to hear from you?
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