tucky | IC contact for lastvoyages

You shouldn't. The choices I make ain't your fault, even when they're bad ones.

Tiffany, you're my friend. We're - a community, all of us, even if it's a weird hard crazy one. We get to help each other. And we get to ask for help.

Your choices aren't my fault, and Sylvanas's choices aren't your fault, but I still feel bad that I could have stopped this if I were paying a little more attention. I mean, wouldn't you?

Maybe you couldn't've stopped it, Dillon. Why do you think you could have?

[A little huff-out of breath.]

I could turn her into dust in less time than it took for her to cross the room to reach you. That's the least of the ways I could have stopped her.

You think I would've wanted you to do that?

You might not like it, but I'd do it anyway. I'd do it if she were hurting anyone who couldn't defend themselves, and I'd be right.

I don't want you solving my problems for me, Dillon.

Don't think like that.

We're all here to help each other. That doesn't stop because you graduated - it's even more important. My first inmate, Elsa, Jean helped so much with her, because she had experience in helping people control their powers, and I didn't, and she needed that. You helped me when I thought I was going to fall apart, just by being you. You're -

[His voice actually chokes.]

Lourdes is my problem, more than anyone's, and I know you're not doing it for me but you are so good for her.

We have different tools. We should solve problems with each other.

No, I... I believe that, too. I do.

But that ain't the same as you jumping in to rescue me whenever I get in trouble.

That wasn't just you getting in trouble. That was her making a decision to brutalize someone, because she wanted to and no one could stop her.

You were reckless, and stupid, and you were believing too hard in ideas about inmates instead of what you actually knew about her, and that doesn't matter. You don't deserve what happened, it wasn't fair consequences, she isn't some natural mindless force that you stumbled into. She committed a kind of violence that nobody deserves, and any warden in a position to rescue you - or anyone else she had her hands on - had a duty to it.

You can't always get rescued, with how crazy things are.

But you deserve it.

And next time it's something like that - something you're scared of in advance - instead of pushing through it alone, you should give us a chance.

... Okay.

But what if I'm not scared but other people are?

[She's thinking about Lourdes and the Enclosure here.]

[He hugs her, then, because he has to, for a second, and get the lump in his throat back down. Gets a few breaths and settles back,]

...then, I guess, you should at least give us a chance to talk about it first. So we can understand why you think something's not risky, or worth the risk, and we can maybe think of things you missed. Does that sound okay?

Yeah. And I'm already doing that. I'm just not coming to a lot of agreements, you know?

... Lots of people are worried about me and Lourdes and her powers in the Enclosure.

Oh.

[Well. He can see where they're coming from, but also he knows how Lourdes really feels about Tiffany; he's not worried at all.]

Like who?

A few people. I don't really wanna name names.

But I don't want to give y'all a chance to run in and save me. I don't think she's gonna do anything to me, but if she did, I'd wanna solve it with just us. And you, maybe.

[He shakes his head.]

No, I think you're right. She would take advantage with a lot of other people, but your trust is really important to her.

Why don't you want to tell me? It's not like tattling, they didn't do anything wrong to worry about you. But I could maybe help reassure some of them.

I don't want them to think that... I don't know. That if they don't agree with something I do, I'm just gonna go tell you or Iris or somebody and get you to talk to them about it for me.

We all take care of each other here, but I'm not a kid.

Well, first of all, it wouldn't work if I didn't agree with you this time.

Second - I'm not talking for you. She's important to me; I'd like to help people understand for her sake, too.

I know it's not the same kind of public discussion as the powers one, but - I don't know. I'd just like to be part of it.

... Letty. Allison. Some other people, maybe. Mostly them.

[He kisses her forehead for a brief moment.]

Thanks for trusting me.

I always trust you, Dillon.

[She finds hand and squeezes it.]

And I love you. And... God. I love her. I love her so much.

Me too.

... I could fuck up her life.

No. Her life has been pretty fucked up for years. By things bigger than any of us.

You could hurt her. And probably you will, eventually. But I think if there's anyone she could learn to forgive for, it'll be you.

I already did hurt her. And it weren't on purpose and it... it weren't even a real mistake, you know? I said one thing and she thought I meant something else.

[But it had showed her that Lourdes is very, very sensitive.]

I think learning to forgive is important.

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orderfromchaos - 2015-07-26 15:43 (UTC) - Expand

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tucky - 2015-07-26 15:59 (UTC) - Expand