♻ 014 | audio/spam

[tucky]

[audio]

Y'all doing okay? Merlin, Mason, Iris? And...

[She almost mentions Simon's name too, but she's unsure of how he feels about her right now - she hasn't yet been able to work up the courage to ask him if he's mad at her for having Merlin exorcise him, and she figures now isn't a good time for that conversation.]

And everyone else, yeah. Everybody. Some people up and disappeared; other people saw that, right? One second they was here and the next they was gone. And then they got replaced by these monsters here. Do you think they turned into them? Is that what happened?

[It's a terrifying (though, luckily, completely off-base) thought.]

Listen - these things are real nasty; I'm sure you've noticed that yourselves. I have had several close calls myself, and... I got my metal rod, from the port, but it ain't doing much. I'm gonna admit right now that I've mostly been running and hiding. How do you fight them? Can you use magic? Exorcisms? Can you--

[She suddenly gives a surprised, scared little yelp.]

-- shit.

[There's a rustling sound as she quickly shoves her phone in her pants pocket, and the sound of quick, light footsteps as she takes off - followed by the heavy, rumbling sound of something very big following. Run, Tucky, run.]

[spam]

[Ordinarily she'd try to take refuge in the chapel, but it doesn't feel safe to her anymore - Dillon's dying in there had partially tainted it for her, and whatever the hell is happening to the floor in the spot where it had happened has finished the job. It's been days since she last visited, and right now she has no plans to ever go back. Mostly, she can be found in the halls - traveling between floors when necessary, and checking up on her people. True to what she says in her broadcast, most of her defense against the monsters involves running as fast as possible, though when she's backed into a corner she can sometimes be found trying to fight one off with an iron fireplace poker. She's woefully unprepared for this. Some of those times she might get rescued, or even manage to find one off, but other times she won't; she'll die many times over the course of the week, sometimes two or three times in a row. The physical effects will be hard to ignore, but she'll push the emotional ones aside for the time being, numbing herself to them for the sake of her sanity.

When she's on her own (though she tries not to be), she moves as little as possible, using her cabin as home base during those first few days. She risks a trip to the dining hall when it gets too hard to ignore the hunger pangs, but it's far enough from her room that she doesn't want to make a habit of it - so she raids whatever is left out, taking as much of what she can find as she can carry.

Later in the week, she can also be found in the infirmary. Merlin works there and she's sticking to him like glue as much as possible; she'll also be trying to use her (very basic) first aid skills to help out the wounded, and (more likely) playing fetch and carry when people need things. She might even go out on rescue missions sometimes - going after people who need help getting to safety. She wants to be brave and heroic; she wants to make her warden proud.]

Comments

[rickitikitarr]

If it were- pick a friend. This warden of yours. If he were in the infirmary right now, and didn't know where you were, hadn't heard from you by the feed, wasn't sure where to begin looking- would you want him to dive out into the ship, if these things are as dangerous to him as they are to you? If they were even stronger, so as they would be, so as he'd face certain death on the off chance that you might be somewhere? Would you want him to be hurt that way?

[tucky]

[She looks down, at the table and at her mug of tea, and swallows.]

I don't... I don't think it's certain death.

[But she has already died once.]

[rickitikitarr]

Think of how much you care about the people you're looking for, and ask yourself what you'd want them to do for you, if the tables were turned. Then, do what you have to.

[tucky]

... I don't know. I think I would want them to do what they thought was the right thing.

One of them - we said we were gonna be a team together, looking out for each other. He might be with his warden or his other friends right now, but if he's not I can't leave him all by himself.

[rickitikitarr]

Leave him a message on the system. The dead are rising so fast, if he's on board, there's no chance he won't receive it.

[tucky]

Unless he's hurt, or... or lost his phone or something.

I don't want him thinking "Tiffany didn't come for me".

[rickitikitarr]

All right, that's a good reason to do something foolhardy.

[Conceding.]

But what you have to do then, is set a limitation on it. You will search for him for a certain number of hours. You will circle the decks, but not more than once, not doubling back. It can be whatever you like, but you have to delineate what you're planning to do.

[tucky]

But--

[She's clearly unhappy about this, worrying at the cuff of her sweatshirt with her fingers.]

Ricki, don't you got people you would keep searching for? Without limitations?

[rickitikitarr]

Honestly? No.

[He admits, with a reluctant smile.]

But I wouldn't want them to. If I were beyond saving, I wouldn't want someone to die trying. I'd want them to look, but not to kill themselves in the effort.

[tucky]

I don't think they're beyond saving at all. And I don't think I'm killing myself.

Anyway, we... come back.

[It sounds wrong to talk about that so flippantly, because she doesn't actually feel that way - there are people who become desensitized to death after finding out how easy resurrections are, but she isn't one of them, at least not yet.

But she likes Ricki a lot, and she doesn't want him to be disappointed in her, or think she's doing something stupid.]

[rickitikitarr]

All right. But don't do it for me, you understand? I'm serious. If we stay friendly, and circle back on this again in a year or so, and you're thinking about it, I want you to remember, I wouldn't want you hurt on account of me.

[Serious.]

[tucky]

You don't want me to be a hero for you?

[She sounds genuinely surprised.]

[rickitikitarr]

I don't want you getting killed for me. There's no such thing as heroes, where I come from.

[tucky]

I think that's sad. Being called a hero was one of the best things that ever happened to me before I came here.

[Too bad it happened because she murdered someone.]

[rickitikitarr]

It is, a little, but that's the way the world is, I'm afraid.

Can I take you back to the infirmary first? You can make that tea.

[tucky]

[She sighs, conflicted.]

Okay. For a little bit. I can check on Merlin.

But then I gotta keep looking for Mason.

[rickitikitarr]

Last time we were talking, you were going to think about where the bible came from.

[Breaking the ice on that, because he's been putting thought into it too.]

[tucky]

-- Yeah. And I have, a little bit.

You wanna talk about that when we walk?

[rickitikitarr]

Certainly.

[He'd normally hold the door for her, but it's a warzone out there, right now, so he just slips through ahead.]

[tucky]

[She barely notices, and definitely doesn't see it as rudeness; she follows him out quickly and quietly, knife and poker in hand.]

... You're gonna be disappointed, I think. I still don't have a real answer.

[rickitikitarr]

That's not a disappointment. There's no perfect answer to any of this.

What are some of the directions that pull at you?

[tucky]

... Well, I guess I have read that there are parts of the Bible that don't fit so well with other parts. So maybe sometimes people got a little mixed up when they was trying to write down God's Word.

[rickitikitarr]

It does make a little more sense, doesn't it? Explains the bits about slaves and pigskin and shellfish, at the very least.

[They're easy targets, but they're goodies.]

Your friend was right, most of the really odd stuff tends to be Old Testament, but a fair amount actually makes it into the new. It says women aren't to wear make up or jewelry, or to speak in church. It advocates prayer for healing, though today we know better and go to doctors, of course. These are things that even the most devout tend not to believe in.

[tucky]

[She looks a little uncomfortable when he mentions prayer for healing; it wasn't long ago that she was tricked into believing that she could do that, after all.]

What does it say about fish? And the women stuff - is that part of the Jewish laws? Dillon told me about those. Purity laws.

[rickitikitarr]

I don't remember precisely, but there were rules about what could and couldn't be eaten.

[Dismissing that, with a wave.]

The New Testament does make condemnation of sexual impurity, of fornication, and of homosexuality. However, if you accept that there are some parts of the bible that do not make sense and should be ignored, then those things are in question. What you have to do is think for yourself, decide what you believe the core values of the book are, and whether those rules are likely to be a slip of the author or the word of Our Lord.