tucky | IC contact for lastvoyages

Tiffany!

Do you have a moment to spare?

Yeah, what is it?

Look, Lark is down for the count and he told me that if anything happened to him, I should go to you.

Nothing's happened, everything's fine.

But - well.

I don't like being left without a contingency plan. If anything does happen -

[He makes a soft, annoyed noise. Asking for help is hard.]

What kind of contingency plan do you need?

Just knowing that if something happened, that there's someone who knows Lark's out and that I don't have anyone watching out for me. This is worse than having a temp, you know.

That's all. I've only told you and Iris. I don't plan on alerting the ship that Lark's asleep. I just want to know if I can count on you if things go bad here. As they sometimes do.

I'll do what I can, but I don't have an item for you or anything, so--

You wanna pretend like we're temps for a while? Like, check in with each other regularly and get to know each other and stuff?

[A long pause.]

I've been here for over a year. You've been here much longer. We've talked a handful of times, and normally I would still say no.

But god, Tiffany, if I'm not feeling like I've actually got some real change in me since then.

So yes. If you've got the time, I certainly have the time.

Hey, I'm not saying it's not gonna be weird. There's a reason people don't like temporary pairings much. And I don't know you much, and I don't think I'm the right type of warden for you, but I don't want you to feel alone. And I don't not want to talk to you, I just don't know if I'm gonna be useful to you.

You wanna hang out on the deck after lunch today?

You're not the right type of warden for me, long term but, honestly? I just don't like being by myself. And I'm not planning on causing trouble or hurting anyone. I'm just planning on sitting around in Lark's cabin, watching television until my brain rots out of my skull.

So the type of warden who wants to meet after lunch for a chat? Is the perfect warden for me at the moment.

You wanna talk about serious shit, or not serious shit? I could tell you why I don't like kings much, and maybe that'd be good for you to hear about, except you've probably heard some of it from peasants and terrorists before.

Ah, yes. So here's the thing. I've been told that I can't take criticism. And, well, that's very true. I'm quite bad at it.

But. I need to.

So I should listen to it. And I will.

Thank you.

[She sounds a little surprised, but she says it with warmth and sincerity all the same.]

I'm not that good at talking to people like you - in a serious way, I mean. Maybe we'll both learn something.

People like me?

Now Tiffany. What does that mean? Answer me that and I'll let you go.

I'm not asking you to let me go; that's not the point. But, you know-- kings, like I said. People who are used to having power and using power. And also people who talk like you - like you're always putting on a show.

But I meant it when I said a couple months ago that I appreciate you being straight with me.

Ah. Yes.

Well, I put on a show because I have done some pretty awful shit in my time. And it seems easier just to let people make their assumptions about me.

Well, I've been trying not to make assumptions.

Assumptions are natural! They're easy to make.

I'd rather people write me off, Tiffany. Because if they write me off, I don't have to do anything.

Is that how it is at home, too?

I was a King. A - dictator. They can form assumptions about me but who cares if they do? I can have them beheaded if I want.

...I wish I could say I was being hyperbolic.

I figured you weren't.

Do you still actually want that power?

I'd be lying if I said no.

I'd probably be graduated if I could say no truthfully.

But you do truthfully want to want to. Right?

I know that I shouldn't want that power. I shouldn't want the power to kill any person I want, any person who pisses me off. And, to an extent, I know that every person, at some level, does want that sort of power. But not every person is prepared to do what I did to get it.

And I know, given the chance, I will repeat those same choices to get it.

But I know I shouldn't. And I am working on trying to learn something different.

You know, I don't--

I don't think wanting it's the problem. I don't think you're right that everyone wants power like that, but I think we do all want awful shit sometimes. Maybe you just gotta find a place where you can let yourself want it, but know that it's a bad idea to actually get it.

I know it's a bad idea to get it. But I still will try. Because I simply don't care.

I told you about my daughter once, Tiffany. I've - been using her death as an excuse to do what I want for years.

IC contact for lastvoyages

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