♻ 018 | text/video

[tucky]

[filtered to Dillon, Iris, Mason, and Simon]

[Everyone on this filter gets the same message, sent separately.]

Can you come see me? I need to talk to you.

[Then, after a moment, an addition.]

Don't worry its nothing bad.

[video]

[Later, after finishing visiting with and giving her news to the above people, Tiffany sets herself up to make a public announcement. She sits cross-legged on her bed, turns on the recorder... and suddenly realizes that she has no idea how she wants to say this.]

I...

... There's a Bible verse that I like. It goes like this: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

[She isn't reading it off of anything; she's memorized it. Considering the last verse she took the time to memorize was about smiting God's enemies for Him, this is an improvement.]

If you know me much at all you probably know I'm a big believer in God. And when I first learned about Him, it was the best deal I ever heard of. I'd never been a part of anything before; never been in anybody's fold. But here I was, learning about somebody who'd love me, and give me a reason to be - I wanted that, you know? Who wouldn't? Feeling like you're loved is the nicest thing.

But then I came here, and I learned that being loved is only part of what's important. You gotta love back, honestly and truly. And I do. I have met the most amazing people and made the most amazing friends, and I wouldn't trade any of you for anything. I told Dr. Cambridge a while ago that I got a lot of hate in my heart sometimes, and that's true. I used to like showing it around a lot. But on the Barge I learned that I got a lot of love in my heart too, and I like showing that around even more.

So what I really meant to say is that I graduated, and it's 'cause of y'all, and I love you very much. Even the people I don't like I kind of love a little bit right now.

[She almost adds Except Arthas here, but bites her tongue.]

But especially the people I like; the people who have helped me. And some of you feel the same way and some of you don't, and that's okay, because love is not self-seeking and me feeling it is enough.

[Pause.]

I'm gonna stay. I'm gonna be a warden. It's kinda scary to me, but I'm doing it. I don't always like how it is on the Barge and last month I was thinking maybe I'd leave, but... I can't do that. It's like my home, now.

That's all.

[And she ends the feed.]

Comments

[forgetyourusedtobe]

But that's its whole purpose.

[tucky]

You don't know that for sure, I bet. That's just what you think.

It's so big, Elena. It's so important. We're going through space on this amazing ship with all its amazing things and amazing people and I don't get how I can just walk away from that forever. Not now, and not in my future.

[forgetyourusedtobe]

[Elena heaves a sigh, a little impatient, but not much. It just always bothers Elena when she sees people getting that attached to the Barge. The Barge is many things and, yes, some of it is wonderful. Some of it is opportunities that will never present themselves back home. But it's still a prison. People still die and get hurt more than they would most anywhere else. People still get trapped here both involuntarily and voluntarily like the way Tiffany is talking now.]

[She also knows she's not going to get anywhere with this conversation, so she drops the topic and switches it abruptly.]

Any plans to celebrate your graduation?

[tucky]

[Tiffany narrows her eyes, confused and surprised by the topic change. In the end, though, she just rolls with it.]

I dunno. No big ones.

[forgetyourusedtobe]

Yeah, I didn't do much for mine either. Had some last drinks with Dean [there's a flicker of a smile that's gone as quickly as it appears] and spent some time with Abigail, but that was about it.

I definitely recommend getting some of those drinks though. [She smiles again, wider than the one before it and certainly more permanent.] I'd say you earned it.

[tucky]

You did stuff with the people you love. I'm gonna do that, too.

And drinks. Definitely gonna get some drinks.

[forgetyourusedtobe]

Good. Best way to celebrate.