tucky | ♻ 018 | text/video

[filtered to Dillon, Iris, Mason, and Simon]

[Everyone on this filter gets the same message, sent separately.]

Can you come see me? I need to talk to you.

[Then, after a moment, an addition.]

Don't worry its nothing bad.

[video]

[Later, after finishing visiting with and giving her news to the above people, Tiffany sets herself up to make a public announcement. She sits cross-legged on her bed, turns on the recorder... and suddenly realizes that she has no idea how she wants to say this.]

I...

... There's a Bible verse that I like. It goes like this: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

[She isn't reading it off of anything; she's memorized it. Considering the last verse she took the time to memorize was about smiting God's enemies for Him, this is an improvement.]

If you know me much at all you probably know I'm a big believer in God. And when I first learned about Him, it was the best deal I ever heard of. I'd never been a part of anything before; never been in anybody's fold. But here I was, learning about somebody who'd love me, and give me a reason to be - I wanted that, you know? Who wouldn't? Feeling like you're loved is the nicest thing.

But then I came here, and I learned that being loved is only part of what's important. You gotta love back, honestly and truly. And I do. I have met the most amazing people and made the most amazing friends, and I wouldn't trade any of you for anything. I told Dr. Cambridge a while ago that I got a lot of hate in my heart sometimes, and that's true. I used to like showing it around a lot. But on the Barge I learned that I got a lot of love in my heart too, and I like showing that around even more.

So what I really meant to say is that I graduated, and it's 'cause of y'all, and I love you very much. Even the people I don't like I kind of love a little bit right now.

[She almost adds Except Arthas here, but bites her tongue.]

But especially the people I like; the people who have helped me. And some of you feel the same way and some of you don't, and that's okay, because love is not self-seeking and me feeling it is enough.

[Pause.]

I'm gonna stay. I'm gonna be a warden. It's kinda scary to me, but I'm doing it. I don't always like how it is on the Barge and last month I was thinking maybe I'd leave, but... I can't do that. It's like my home, now.

That's all.

[And she ends the feed.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I don't wanna mess around with the past too much.

Okay. Okay, I guess that makes sense. As long as it's your choice and you're happy with it.

I'd rather make some good come out of what happened than try to erase it all, you know? Getting rid of whole years... I don't think that's a good idea.

Yeah. I think there's things I wouldn't erase, bad things, even if I was given the opportunity.

And I got some good out of it already, you know? I wouldn't've found God if it hadn't been for my lawyer.

... What's some of the bad things you wouldn't erase?

Joe. I wouldn't erase Joe.

[He's about to explain more, but he hesitates, unsure where to start. Joe was such a huge part of his life, it's hard to imagine giving any kind of sufficient explanation.]

[Predictably, she asks anyway.]

Who's Joe?

He was my . . . mentor, I guess.

And then he ruined my family and had me killed.

That's... why? Why would he do that?

He didn't have his priorities right. He wanted his wife back, and his kid. But they didn't want him. We wanted him. We worked hard for him, and he just - dropped us, like garbage.

It's hard, wanting someone who don't want you back. But that don't mean he should kill you.

Well, he did. And he didn't even have the decency to do it himself.

Sounds to me like he ain't worth your time.

That's what I'm thinking, lately. But I miss him all the same.

Where is he now?

I don't know. I really have no idea. I suspect he ran off and left the family to fend for themselves, but there's no way to know for sure what the state of things is because I'm stuck here.