tucky | ♻ 016

You know, I been wondering. If a girl gets pregnant and kills the baby, how many of y'all consider that murder? It's a real... hot-button issue where I come from, I guess; it's a big deal. There's people who feel so strongly about it that they believe the ones who actually do it - the doctors and stuff, and the people who work for 'em - deserve to die too. And it happens. People will go in and kill somebody like that, and other people will celebrate.

But then there's other people who say it ain't bad at all, 'cause we got rights to our own bodies and nobody should try and take that away. That's sexual liberation, and it's the same thing that says girls should be able to have a lot of sex and not get called sluts and whores. I always liked that part, at least, 'cause I been called those things before and it makes you feel dirty and small. But I knew guys who had way more sex than I did, and they never got called shit. Ever notice that? It's weird, how that happens.

And then there's the whole issue with condoms - which I use now, mostly, when I remember, so I don't need another lecture about that; don't worry. If you're gonna have sex, you're supposed to use 'em, or you end up with that problem I already talked about. But condoms are a real pain - they ain’t sexy or romantic or anything like that. You got to stop and put 'em on, and then you can feel 'em, and… I don’t know, I just like it better without. And I bet I ain't the only one.

It's confusing to think about; all of this is. But it's all tied together.

[warden filter]

I'm sorry for flipping the bird on the warden filter last week. I was mad and I'm still a little mad, but I think I do trust y'all, and I would like my actions not to be held against me. Please. Thank you.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

My warden said we weren't friends anymore, and he was gonna unpair us and leave. But he had a parasite in him that was making him feel that way. I forgave him.

Sure, because he wasn't himself. If he'd said that entirely on his own, would you forgive him?

... I would be hurt. Very hurt; my heart would be broken.

But he wouldn't.

Yeah, I hope not.

But if that happened, could you do it?

If it happened, he wouldn't want me to, because he wouldn't want me anymore.

Now that's just sad.

I know. But it won't happen. He ain't somebody I'm worried about losing.

Everybody loses everybody else eventually.

Well, that's a real depressing way of looking at it.

But I think you know what I meant.

It's realistic. Most people spend their whole lives convincing themselves it's not.

[Yeah, he knows. His cynicism is just leaking out lately, he was still seething about Vergil's "team angel" crack the other day.]