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♻ 020 | audio/spam
[audio]
[After Mason leaves, Tiffany is sorting through a lot of feelings, but is calm and composed as she addresses the network. Her voice sounds a little bit more rough and hoarse than usual, but that's it. She has some stuff to say - both about Mason, and (belatedly) about her warden.]
I'm glad we picked Paris. Thank you. I'm sad Merlin missed it, but I got to spend a lot of time with Mason before he left, and that was a real good place to do it in.
[Indeed, Mason had been one of the people she'd spent the most time with - Barge residents could easily have spotted the two of them running around the city like idiots, holding hands in the streets and stealing kisses in quiet corners.
They could also have seen Tiffany sitting alone, looking melancholy and keenly feeling the absence of Merlin's company.]
You know, they were good guys, Merlin and Mason. I got a lot of warden friends who I love very much, but I think Merlin was the best one to have been my own warden, and I would never have wanted to trade him away. We were real perfect together; we were two peas in a pod. I know my graduating's got a lot to do with me, but I never would've done it so fast without him. And Mason... Mason was like no guy I have ever been with before. Guys from where I'm from don't treat me bad, but Mason was sweet and charming and romantic and I might never have that again, so I'm glad I got to have that experience here. He was a good experience. Both of 'em were good experiences. And I don't regret either of 'em; not for a single second. It's real easy for me to love people, when they treat me right - and they did. They did.
[She clears her throat abruptly, like she's trying to get rid of a cough; she's starting to get teary and it shows in her voice, so she decides to just end it there.]
Okay, I'm done; that's all I got to say.
[Click. She won't completely fall apart or try to isolate herself, but she'll be walking around in a fog for a little bit, and will spend more time than usual holed up in her room. And later some filters are added, one after the other, with a few hours separating them.]
[filtered to Dillon, Iris, and Simon]
Hey, you guys doing okay?
[It's very similar to what she'd said when Merlin, Sha-infected, had told her he was going to unpair from her. The circumstances are different, but the end result is the same. Her little core group is now two men down, and her instinct is to pull the rest in even tighter.]
[filtered to Allison, Barbara, Bucky, Elena, Iris, Letty, Morgana, and Tig]
[Everyone on this filter is someone she knows is a friend of either Mason or Merlin. She hesitates before making it, not sure what she should say or even if she wants to say anything at all - but in the end, she says this.]
I'm supposed to be working on doing better at thinking about other people and their feelings, and caring about 'em even when they ain't giving me nothing for it. And I guess I'm succeeding at it, since I graduated and all.
So I just wanna say that I know it ain't just about me. I know y'all suffered a loss too, and I'm real sorry about that.
[filtered to Crowley]
pub?
[/filtered to Crowley]
[telepathic message to Jean]
[After discovering that the telepathic chip doesn't work while she's in her cabin (even after five months and a graduation, she's still only vaguely aware of the SA Filters and what they do), Tiffany heads out to the Level 6 common room closest to her end of the hallway. There, she curls up in one of the big armchairs and broadcasts out one emotion: sadness.]
[spam]
[Tiffany will continue to show up to everything she's supposed to, including meals in the dining hall (sometimes she sits alone, other times she spots a friendly face and joins them) and her work in the infirmary (where - unless someone is hurt or needs attention - she can mostly be found sorting through supplies and keeping the clinic area neat). She heads out onto the deck most evenings, where she breaks her habit of hugging the side of the Barge and sitting on the safe, solid floor - she stands right at the railing, looking out at the stars.
She starts out taking all this about as well as can be expected - she's down in the dumps, but she knows life will go on. Then she begins to find herself wandering through the hallways on levels 4 and 7, hesitating in front of 4-19 and and 7-11 - Mason and Merlin's old rooms, respectively. Their doors are blank now, of course, but that doesn't stop her from standing in front of them for minutes at a time, like she's waiting for someone to come out. As the days go on, this becomes more and more common, and her stops become longer and longer. Eventually, they'll start lasting for hours. She won't connect it to her use of the Admiral powers or any other outside influences right away, but for anyone else that does, she's clearly very, very affected. Her loss of her friends and the Barge's loss of its inmates have become inexorably linked in her mind, and it's quickly turning into an obsessive fixation.]
[After Mason leaves, Tiffany is sorting through a lot of feelings, but is calm and composed as she addresses the network. Her voice sounds a little bit more rough and hoarse than usual, but that's it. She has some stuff to say - both about Mason, and (belatedly) about her warden.]
I'm glad we picked Paris. Thank you. I'm sad Merlin missed it, but I got to spend a lot of time with Mason before he left, and that was a real good place to do it in.
[Indeed, Mason had been one of the people she'd spent the most time with - Barge residents could easily have spotted the two of them running around the city like idiots, holding hands in the streets and stealing kisses in quiet corners.
They could also have seen Tiffany sitting alone, looking melancholy and keenly feeling the absence of Merlin's company.]
You know, they were good guys, Merlin and Mason. I got a lot of warden friends who I love very much, but I think Merlin was the best one to have been my own warden, and I would never have wanted to trade him away. We were real perfect together; we were two peas in a pod. I know my graduating's got a lot to do with me, but I never would've done it so fast without him. And Mason... Mason was like no guy I have ever been with before. Guys from where I'm from don't treat me bad, but Mason was sweet and charming and romantic and I might never have that again, so I'm glad I got to have that experience here. He was a good experience. Both of 'em were good experiences. And I don't regret either of 'em; not for a single second. It's real easy for me to love people, when they treat me right - and they did. They did.
[She clears her throat abruptly, like she's trying to get rid of a cough; she's starting to get teary and it shows in her voice, so she decides to just end it there.]
Okay, I'm done; that's all I got to say.
[Click. She won't completely fall apart or try to isolate herself, but she'll be walking around in a fog for a little bit, and will spend more time than usual holed up in her room. And later some filters are added, one after the other, with a few hours separating them.]
[filtered to Dillon, Iris, and Simon]
Hey, you guys doing okay?
[It's very similar to what she'd said when Merlin, Sha-infected, had told her he was going to unpair from her. The circumstances are different, but the end result is the same. Her little core group is now two men down, and her instinct is to pull the rest in even tighter.]
[filtered to Allison, Barbara, Bucky, Elena, Iris, Letty, Morgana, and Tig]
[Everyone on this filter is someone she knows is a friend of either Mason or Merlin. She hesitates before making it, not sure what she should say or even if she wants to say anything at all - but in the end, she says this.]
I'm supposed to be working on doing better at thinking about other people and their feelings, and caring about 'em even when they ain't giving me nothing for it. And I guess I'm succeeding at it, since I graduated and all.
So I just wanna say that I know it ain't just about me. I know y'all suffered a loss too, and I'm real sorry about that.
[filtered to Crowley]
pub?
[/filtered to Crowley]
[telepathic message to Jean]
[After discovering that the telepathic chip doesn't work while she's in her cabin (even after five months and a graduation, she's still only vaguely aware of the SA Filters and what they do), Tiffany heads out to the Level 6 common room closest to her end of the hallway. There, she curls up in one of the big armchairs and broadcasts out one emotion: sadness.]
[spam]
[Tiffany will continue to show up to everything she's supposed to, including meals in the dining hall (sometimes she sits alone, other times she spots a friendly face and joins them) and her work in the infirmary (where - unless someone is hurt or needs attention - she can mostly be found sorting through supplies and keeping the clinic area neat). She heads out onto the deck most evenings, where she breaks her habit of hugging the side of the Barge and sitting on the safe, solid floor - she stands right at the railing, looking out at the stars.
She starts out taking all this about as well as can be expected - she's down in the dumps, but she knows life will go on. Then she begins to find herself wandering through the hallways on levels 4 and 7, hesitating in front of 4-19 and and 7-11 - Mason and Merlin's old rooms, respectively. Their doors are blank now, of course, but that doesn't stop her from standing in front of them for minutes at a time, like she's waiting for someone to come out. As the days go on, this becomes more and more common, and her stops become longer and longer. Eventually, they'll start lasting for hours. She won't connect it to her use of the Admiral powers or any other outside influences right away, but for anyone else that does, she's clearly very, very affected. Her loss of her friends and the Barge's loss of its inmates have become inexorably linked in her mind, and it's quickly turning into an obsessive fixation.]
Spam
[She lets out a low whistle as she steps into the cabin.]
Damn, Eggsy.
Spam
...It's a mate's house. I slept over a couple times.
[He shows her through to the kitchen. There's a recipe book already open from where he was thumbing through earlier, and a few cupboards and drawers left open after some earlier rummaging.]
Spam
[She's not counting hotel rooms or palaces she toured in Paris, here.
In the kitchen, she heads over to the book, flipping a few pages.]
What're we making again?
Spam
Fairy cakes, I thought. My mum used to make 'em when I was little.
[And he's not ashamed to admit that he's maybe indulging in a bit of homesick nostalgia right now. He reaches across and flicks a few pages until he finds a picture to show her.]
Spam
[She leans in to get a closer look.]
They look like cupcakes. Are they different?
Spam
[He starts looking out ingredients and bowls. There may have been a small amount of Admiraling to do his grocery shopping for this, but not much, and he's only vaguely conscious of the effects of it.]
So you good mates with Anya?
Spam
Spam
[He shares his head, chatting while he works.]
We've only talked once, an' that was about tryin' to shift the Barge. Seems like she's been here a while?
Spam
... I been meaning to talk to her, actually.
Spam
About what?
[Being a graduate warden, he'd guess, but he leaves the question open-ended.]
Spam
Just thinking she might need a listening ear, maybe.
Spam
[Ah.]
...Yeah. Yeah, maybe. Know not everyone likes to talk about it, but. Ain't never easy to say goodbye.
Spam
[And talking and talking and talking.]
-- but I know not everyone is.
Spam
[Eggsy smiles faintly. He's mouthy sometimes but he's basically a listener - and as a talker, Tiffany is easy company for him.]
Nah. But sometimes people just don't wanna talk 'til they know there's someone who don't mind listenin'.
Spam
[Once the ingredients are laid out, she starts sorting through the measuring cups, looking for the right one to use.]
I don't always think about if people wanna listen or not. Probably makes people sick of me, sometimes.
But she's my friend and I'd listen to her.
Re: Spam
Cuz you're a good mate. Can you sort out flour an' sugar?
[He checks the recipe and makes a start, cutting through a block of butter along one of the measurement lines.]
...An' I ain't sick of listenin' to you, for what that's worth.
Spam
... Thanks, Eggsy. You're a good mate, too.
[Look at her and her exotic British slang.]
Spam
Cheers.
[He grins as he works, weirdly delighted by her adopting his turn of phase.]
You need to watch out, you're gonna go native at this rate. Maybe next time we'll end up in London.
Spam
[She gamely tries to keep her smile from wavering when a little voice in the back of her head reminds her that she has two fewer now.]
London'd be cool, though. Would you show me around?
Spam
[He can guess what she's thinking, and it warrants a quick reassuring squeeze of her shoulder.]
Yeah, 'course I would. VIP tour an' all.
Spam
Thanks. I wish I'd've thought to ask Mason if he'd take me when we was in Paris. I figured we couldn't leave the city, I guess.
Spam
You might get another chance, yeah? You could visit 'im, sometime.
Spam
I been trying to get over him for months, though. You wouldn't know that from how I talk or act, but I have been. Or saying I'm going to, anyway. But he was confusing and that made it hard.
Spam
Yeah? Sorry to hear it, luv. [His smile is small, sympathetic.] S'why I don't really bother with all that.
Spam
I can't help it but like romance too, though. Being kissed and hugged, belonging to somebody.
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